Distraction and self-discovery

These past couple of days, I've been thinking whether I need to check myself to the shrink or I need to pray alot...I'm in a complete different state of mind. Only God knows..I can only make plans and the rest is not mine...

Crossing Path

we don't meet people by accident, they are meant to cross our path for a reason.

No More Robsten...

Just this morning I read a devastating news about Robsten. I think it's over. The news was about Kristen who allegedly cheating on Robert with her Snow White director, Rupert Sanders, a 41 year-old man, married with two kids. Today all news and tweets are devoted to Kristen. She made a public statement in  People magazine, saying she was truly sorry and she apologized tp someone she truly loves and respects: Rob..." I love him, I love him.I'm so so sorry". Her current photos of lip locking with Rupert were spread out in the media, fans are not happy about it. She made a huge mistake..and people including myself who watch the news and all the comments from the people, had made us lost faith in Robsten, The couple who people adore and dedicate their life this past four years. Yes, one mistake can not be forgotten, but can they be forgiven? we may speculate all we want, but I think the answer is up to both Rob and Kristen, They are the one who manage this relationship up until now, they have survived this whole media frenzy, and crazy fans of twihards. I am someone who is married, I know it is gonna be a long journey for someone like Rob to ever forgive her. It takes time..and if the relationship is worth fighting for, then it needs to be fixed. I've seen so many videos of Robert and Kristen together since 2008. They are meant to be. But, God himself who puts together them, and God himself who separates them.Wish them can go through this...if they break up..time will tell when he and kristen will reunite again. I keep my fingers cross.I love Robsten. 

Keep on Walking

Keep on Walking...

Life may look like it's unfair, and we are just trying to cope with everything that happens in our life, trying to resolve it, trying to suck it up...but sometimes we are just so vulnerable we can't stand it anymore. We often think..can't it be more difficult..as a mock for all the unfortunate things happen in our life.. Yeah, damn right, that happens sometimes. Was it such a waste? that everything we did in our life, doesn't turn out well in the future? Was it a waste of time, money, energy that, someone else thinks we have wasted. It did however, became the turning point of the present we have now...We wish something could have been done differently, but apparently they can't be undone. It may sound pathetic but all we could do just keep on walking to whatever future that holds for us, I myself can't think ..that sometimes I did something differently in the past...but regret are just not good for me, regrets will give me more regrets to come..why I didn't do this, did that, done that..name it..I thought about it. Regret is a sin..can't they see that. I don't want to regret what I did, or what I didn't do.. I just can't. But if a person keeps on reminding how a waste of things we have done...it hurts, but I'm not gonna make it an obstacle for me to move forward..it may not be running...it may not change the present what I have now..it just ..it keeps me looking ahead, and not seeing my past because I'm not gonna be that person...that always feel sorry for everything that happened in my life. Nope..I'm just keep on walking..to let God shows me where my next destination would be...

"regrets and mistakes are memories made...who would have thought bittersweet this was taste"--Adele--someone like you

"Life Immitating Art..?"

Ok....I admit..I freaking love twilight!I am a fan fiction addict and guilty by it...:) and seriously because the cast of Edward and Bella are "supposedly" a real life couple..now I am also a fan of Robsten (that's what you call for Robert and Kristen "couple name" from the fans and media)..The more they hide themselves from the media..the fans and the papz are goin insane to take their pictures everywhere, of course they wont admit anything if they are a couple..and its been going almost 4 freaking years! Personally because of their chemistry in twilight and..off screen pictures of them hanging out and caught kissing (but never admit it)..have made me intrigue about their life..as a fan, you want to know if they are gonna last this relationship since they are committed in Twilight Saga until this year..If the saga ended, will they still "hang out together"..they even share a house together..well according to what I read of course. As a good fan, you want them to have civilized and normal life away from the papz that hound them down no matter where they go..If they truly in a serious relationship, well that's good for them because they have survived the critics, gossip, bulls*** stories of cheating/pregnancy rumors, and public scrutinized for not "admitting" anything about their relationship. From my deepest heart I adore these two since 2008 of Twilight 1st movie...I was drawn by their on and off screen persona. They could be the low profile of hollywood couple...because no matter what they are admitting..the media still stir the rumors! This writing is just a ramble thoughts of mine..that has been a fan of Robsten..Cheers!

Looking at the Past, Thankful for the Present

Looking at the Past, Thankful for the Present 

I attended a friend's wedding tonight, and saw someone from my past love. That person was still handsome, well-dressed up and..seemed happy with his wife now. I was a bit dressed up cause I knew I somehow
gonna see him, of course we didn't exactly bump into each other tonight (thank God, or that's gonna be awkward!) and while standing there I kinda watched him from a far, and kept telling myself, "she was not that pretty".."I guessed when he sees me, he would dumbstruck at me"..ehm..that was just an awful thought, I mean..hello...I was treated badly by him, and now I'm gonna make him feel sorry cause he dumped me? You know what, that's not gonna happen..ever! Maybe because tonight was the first time again I saw him since 8 years, and the feeling of making him "see" me still there..but very little.Tonight is not the night where I feel that I need to revenge, no....it's just one of those moments where I sit back, looking at my past, and I knew where I belong ..here in the present and also time to think that..maybe if I rewind my past, i won't make a fool out of myself..by to easy to fall..and be a third wheel most of a time. I am living in present time, and glad to have my family. One of my best friends,Renna, just told me about her life being so flat and bored, and whats my opinion when I'm in the situation. I said I write, or imagining things, because our minds also control our happiness. It's a nice escape to imagine things (but still not ignore the present problem) because we can create "happy thoughts" and it will pick up our mood. She also said we just have to cherish the moment no matter how bad it is because regrets put you nowhere.and darn well I agreed!

I"m backkkkk!

Today will mark my 4 months of absent in blogging world...life has been busy. I've been back teaching for kindergarten class. And my stories have been handed to the publisher.Just cross our finger some of them will be published..like in the next 2 years. coz they say that publishing a book is not as easy as 1,2,3 or flipping your palm...I know it. I just wish they would tell me if they are not good materials. I know I haven't written my blog like forever..really I was just tired and didn't feel like writing, since my mind n body are occupied with my job. I miss my Smallville series the most, it ended last April.. I miss Tom Welling, heck he is one gorgeous man!Ehm...I wish..ups! His image just keep floating in my head, and I have just the perfect idea for my next  story..which involve a guy that look like him, anyway I'm still writing just on my blackberry,and I am still a fan of reading fan fiction. There are some and most awesome writers out there. I am just a really tiny good than they are. Some news haven't changed such as still no box office movies are imported here, I guess I missed Transformers and Pirates...heck, please don't let me miss Harry Potter and Breaking Dawn...Please..people who work for movies, just work out that tax problem will ya'! We are in desperate need of imported movies. It doesn't mean I do not appreciate Indonesian movies, but please no more "Indonesian Ghost stories". Okay,I'm outta here...btw, Kiana is K1 now...and I'm having my 2 weeks holiday!yay! c u....